In a the span of a few months, I became a widow, solo parent to my daughter Sydney, left my full time job, became a full time life coach (with 1 client), and a basket case. I was now working from home by myself alone solo and independent. Initially it felt really, really scary and got worse. I was lonely, frustrated, overwhelmed and scared. I put on the face of competence to those around me. I was easily distracted; I took many courses online and in person trying to fill up this fear. I was disorganized, I had no plan, I kind of knew what direction I wanted to go in, struggled with prioritizing and following through to do what it takes to make it work as an entrepreneur and solo Mom. I was failing. I didn’t want to be the grumpy never seen Mommy. I realize that wasn’t the life I wanted to live any longer.
Here is what I knew for sure – from my 20+ years of being a marriage and family therapist, working in mental health first as a therapist then as director of an outpatient clinic. I couldn’t do it all by myself, no matter how much I tried. I needed to have the support of other and I needed to ask for the help and accept it when it was offered.
I hired a coach. I was able to figure out my priorities, get my life plan together and become more organized with my business. Then, I worked on my inner messages of self doubt and not enough syndromes. That whole idea of “who are you to be so deserving of the life you dream of” syndrome and who will buy from you anyway syndrome. Those are just lies we tell ourselves when we are unclear about our worth in the world. I moved into finding a place to express my feelings and inner messages that was productive and intentional – sought out quality connections from other entrepreneurs, solo parenting Moms and mentors who were where I wanted to be – that was essential because networking with other entrepreneurs forced me to take personal responsibility and become accountable to my goals and for the results I wanted to experience, I rounded out my plan with focusing on the fun stuff of life – traveling the world, doing half marathons, working on my Spanish, and hanging out with loved ones.
I share my story in the Amazon best seller Mommy Divas on the Move: 16 Essential secrets for Mompreneurs and on my podcast Change is Personal. That day I struggled with the car seat was the day of my husband’s funeral. It was truly a defining event in my life that upon reflection helped me to get to where I am today.